Episode 3 recap…
Special Guest: Zack, the abandoned roadie, who stopped in to tell a Love Gun story after asking 500 times to do it.
PSAbe: If you’ve ever marked yourself safe on Facebook, you’re a piece of garbage.
Abe Kanan Tip: If you’re arguing with someone, tickle them and see what happens.
Abe Kanan Thought: “Ann, are you drunk right now?”
Round Three of Request Wars: 2x Champion Vinny in Lombard “Welcome to the Jungle” vs Challenger Ann from Chicago “Kickstart My Heart” – Winner: Ann
The Douchebag Power Rankings:
Heatseeker: Bill Walton (For his LSD being knocked loose from his system and making the White Sox game amazing)
#5: The lady in front of Abe at (censored sub shop) and the guy who worked the register (For paying for her sandwich with boob money and then they tried to give Abe the boob money as change)
#4: Abe Kanan (For not being able to run around the block)
#3: Chris Zylka (For covering up his Paris Hilton tattoo with a gorilla tattoo)
#2: A-Rod (For his car getting robbed of $500,000 in jewelry)
#1: Jussie Smollett (For wanting to sue Chicago for suing him)
Good Day/Shame Day Requests: Good – sex for the first time in 3 years, painting grandpas house and seeing an uncle’s soccer game — Shame – blowing up the company truck and not catching catfish, sending creepy DM’s to chicks, eating floor pizza that fell under the couch.
Love Gun Stories returned for an encore with stories from Abe, Dave Lee Roth’s Roadies Son Zack (who was also a roadie,) and a whopper of a tale by Jay the Gay.
Abe discussed his expensive fantasy football league, where he is the reigning champ. Bass checked in to reveal how bad his draft went and some of the top picks.
Woody the Prison Squad Leader called in to tell an incredible story about a tweaker and his monkey.
Sam called in and was stunned when Abe asked what he would do if he tickled him.
Roker checked in with a slob show tip.
Jay the Gay put several people (Abe, Roker, Bass and Sam) into their gay slang categories.
The private zoo prank call was played.
Can Crush Jack checked in to crush a can in Abe’s honor.
Abe discussed people complaining about tourists around Abbey Road.